Open letter to the American Psychological Association (APA) on the rise in trans youth diagnoses

Note: The APA Committee on Sexual Orientation and Gender Diversity meets in late March.  Anyone with concerns similar to those expressed by Justine Kreher in this post may want to address them to the committee. Lisa Marchiano, LCSW, a Jungian therapist who blogs at www.theJungSoul.com (Twitter: @LisaMarchiano), has also written a letter to the APA which was posted today at Youth Gender Professionals.

Justine Deterling blogs at thehomoarchy.com and can be found on Twitter @thehomoarchy.


by Justine Kreher

I am a 48-year-old, married, average US citizen, who has been in a same-sex relationship with the same person for 18 years. I consider myself a centrist skeptic. I believe that all sides of every issue need to be heard in order to truly make informed and fair decisions.  I am very concerned about how valid criticism/discussion is now called “hate speech” in many arenas of identity politics and how this is being used to try to muzzle free speech. Curtailing discussion around something as serious as permanently altering minors (children and teens) is a very bad idea.

I became aware of youth transitions because I wanted to blog about lesbian relationship issues (thehomoarchy.com). This led me to read more LGBT websites and message boards. That is when I first became aware that some gay men and lesbians are concerned about how gender dysphoric children are treated, and that most dysphoric children grow up to be LGB and not trans. I am a latecomer to this issue compared to some lesbians who have been talking and writing about the impacts of transitions on the lesbian community for years now.

I delved into most of the studies available to the public and gathered other information. A detailed list of the risks involved in youth transitions can be found in my blog post “Do Youth Transgender Diagnoses Put Would Be Gay, Lesbian, and Bisexual Adults at Risk for Unnecessary Medical Intervention?” [A summary of a few of the key points can be found at the bottom of the current post.∗]

I can only speak for myself and don’t necessarily endorse anyone else’s opinions. I am not opposed to treatment for transgender children if evidence shows it is safe for all gender nonconforming youth and I want the best care for everybody.

I wrote a letter outlining my concerns and emailed it to over 150 people in LGBT rights orgs and media, as well as to mental health organizations. The American Psychological Association (APA) was one of only two which even responded. Their response, written by Clinton W. Anderson, at that time the Director of the Office on Sexual Orientation and Gender Diversity at APA, was pretty generic and did not address my concerns.  It consisted mostly of a reiteration of the APA’s current policies, although Anderson did say he (?) would share my concerns at an upcoming meeting of the APA Committee on Sexual Orientation and Gender Diversity in late March.

I have just written the below reply, which I sent today. (Letter has been altered slightly for publication on 4thWaveNow).


To the Office on Sexual Orientation and Gender Diversity at the APA,

Thank you very much for your response to my letter.  I would like a chance to address some unresolved issues. I will be posting this letter publicly.

I began researching the sharp rise in children being diagnosed as transgender to diffuse what I then saw as increasing transphobia among some gays and lesbians who were extremely angry about the prospect of false positives in youth transitions, because of how it disproportionately affects their communities. I was certain that gender therapists, researchers, medical practitioners, and LGBT organizations would be taking great care to ensure the safety of all gender nonconforming children. Instead, what I found, were…

  • dishonest statements about the known safety of hormone blockers and early social transitions
  • numerous stories about negligent gender therapists
  • lesbian/bi minor females identifying as trans for long enough to have an official diagnosis and be endangered
  • a tone-deaf attitude among supporters of the 100% gender affirmation model towards gay men and lesbian adults who promise this could have been them as children
  • trans kid camp materials where no other coping skills or role models are provided other than transition
  • sex reassignment surgery on minors discussed as if it were no more harmless than a mani-pedi
  • public statements that the only option parents have with every single child who claims they are transgender is to transition them or they will commit suicide
  • parents of children who had desisted being ignored
  • detransitioners being treated badly
  • professionals insinuating/stating outright that transitioning a few kids inappropriately is worth it
  • a general failure to take seriously the damage false positives can do, and the horrible human rights abuse against the diversity of expression of the non-trans gay/bisexual community.

I acknowledge transgender people’s right to advocate for their own community and to advocate for what is best for trans young people. I also understand that they view any hindrance to transition as an affront to their humanity and their rights. And I truly want to believe the vast majority of the young people in these programs have intractable gender identity disorder/gender dysphoria. I respect that they have rights and society is morally obligated to provide them the best evidence-based mental health and medical care.

I’m also familiar with the positive research on transitions to treat gender dysphoria. Almost all of the studies on transgender adults show low regret rates. Many studies also show that transition relieves the dysphoria. I’m also aware of the research studies on trans youth that show positive psychological benefits associated with earlier transitions. The two most cited are the Dutch 2014 study where the youth were intensively screened (a type of gatekeeping rapidly going away in many cases), where five stopped communications and one died from complications of genital surgery, but the remaining 50 eligible for followup were doing very well. The other is the Trans Youth Project study that showed socially transitioned children at followup had almost normal levels of mental health. However, as this Yale medical student stated, “The authors compared their cohort of children to cohorts in studies that were conducted more than 10 years ago, during a time when society was even less accepting of transgender youth.” This study doesn’t compare them with kids in loving, supportive homes, who are not transitioned as children, but who will be accepted in their own decision-making process when they are adults.

Neither of these studies had control groups to compare desistance rates for early social transitions or for the effects of hormone blockers, because (according to the current narrative), using such control groups would be unethical.

You mentioned you want to provide “evidence based care.”  So when you have your meeting at the end of March 2017, these are the issues I hope you will be discussing:

 1)    As I asked in my previous email, why do almost no children desist once put on Lupron, and where is evidence it doesn’t interfere with the youth’s identity formation? There has also been a recent negative story about the safety of Lupron.

2)    Why are there twice as many female young people coming to some gender clinics than males in Canada, England, and the Netherlands? Why is this not a cause for concern, when in Oregon, a 15-year old can obtain a mastectomy without parental consent, and activists are pushing for this everywhere else? Any other time the epidemiology of a condition changes this much, researchers have taken notice. Why, on this issue, is it treated as nothing but social liberation that deserves nothing less than total affirmation by a large number of mental health professionals, especially when it is well known that female teens are prone to body hatred issues and social contagion? I’m not aware of any APA studies seeking answers.

3)    Why is a hypothetical study involving for example, 200 gender dysphoric youth who are…

  • loved/supported
  • not gender policed in anyway as far as clothing and behavior
  • placed in safe schools
  • provided adult role models who have coped with being gender nonconforming without surgery
  • lovingly told there is nothing wrong with them and they will be loved and supported in their transition when they are mature as possible
  • afforded exceptions if the child was self harming and transition viewed as the best option

…not morally acceptable, but what is morally acceptable is…. 

  • the APA and medical field instituting ill-defined protocols, which are loosening daily, with no control groups, in circumstances where most dysphoric kids are pre-gay/lesbian, /bi and not trans, when effects on desistance are unknown
  • uncertainty if these practices risk disfiguring healthy bodies
  • risking perpetrating violations of the Hippocratic oath to not over treat
  • potentially violating the future 60-70 years of a child’s life in the case of false positives, that violates his/her journey to come to accept him or herself as a gay man or lesbian, even one with a difficult childhood; which amounts to an abuse of his/her human right to fertility, and an abuse of his/her now drastically altered sexuality
  • unknowingly participating in a civil and human rights abuse of gender nonconforming people who turn out not to be trans but are more likely homosexual; something that could affect thousands of people in the future?

Is this happening to socially transitioned children and tweens on hormone blockers? I am not saying I know it is, but unfortunately, you can’t prove it is not.

The psych field (including APA members) has skipped an entire, more moderate approach to treatment as outlined in the first example and gone straight to a 100% affirmation model (no attempt is made to help the child find alternative ways to cope) with no control studies and no meaningful publicly expressed concern over effects on persistence.

Does the APA understand that even though there is no clear-cut data that the very high stakes are parents having their children ripped from them by trans activists and gender therapists working with the government? Parents who may be loving and supportive but don’t want to permanently, physically alter their minor child for the rest of their lives based on data that is not solid. Does the APA understand that these governmental policies activists are working to implement could result in children being removed from the care of parents who protected their gender confused teens from permanent disfigurement by keeping them away from the gender clinic and the 100% affirmation model?

 This is morally acceptable to the psychological and medical field?

4)    Since the APA is encouraging supporting nonbinary identities, what research does the APA have to justify these recommendations, since it is increasing numbers of 18/19-year-old females (younger now in some cases) adopting these identities, many of which are recent proliferations spread on social media; and many of these “nonbinary” females are seeking breast amputation? Since there are now up to 50 of these gender identities, does the APA support reinforcing all of them, and if so, based on what data? Does the APA have proof that the use of dozens of different pronouns associated with these identities is actually adaptive and healthy for these young people?  Has the APA considered what will happen to these young people, the vast majority of whom would have found a way to fit into the binary 15 years ago? When these young people leave the open minded, nurturing environments of the therapist’s office and academia, they may be faced with employers who have every motivation to not hire individuals who require them to force employees/customers to use self created language or risk lawsuits/fines.

The story below highlights the fact that the “infinite genders” (actual quote) approach of gender-affirming therapists is in fact contributing to gender and sexual confusion in teenage girls. There are many more examples and I hope APA members are watching genderqueer young people on social media, because it is not reflecting a culture of mental health.

//4thwavenow.com/2016/01/18/teen-decides-shes-not-trans-after-all-but-struggles-with-peer-pressure/

Will the APA study the effects on 5th grade girls (known to have inferiority complexes in relation to their male peers) who are not encouraged to view their traits as an expression of personality or as an indication they may be lesbian or bisexual when they get older (because at 10 this isn’t appropriate), but to instead view themselves as trans by gender-activist trainings in schools? This is in fact happening (for just one example see this video at 3:07:00). And can the APA demonstrate why any of this is actually healthier for these individuals and society than normalizing female “masculinity” and male “femininity” and stressing the shared, diverse traits and humanity of the two sexes?

What culture are you helping to foster? Several parents of transgender children who have been featured in the media have made statements which appear homophobic (i.e. “trans isn’t like homosexuality, it’s ok to talk to kids about it” “I hope my little ‘girl’ stays exactly the same”). From observations by some who have attended support groups for gender nonconforming children (often not run by mental health professionals), they are very politicized environments, where even questioning any of these practices is met with extremely negative reactions. What will be the effect on borderline dysphoric children, when their social life revolves around support groups such as this one; whose members and leaders screamed “transphobia” when a judge removed a child from a home due to possible Munchausen-by-proxy child abuse? Since you and your colleagues are medicalizing gender nonconforming children; and since the APA considers helping a young person adjust to their natal sex as “conversion therapy,” shouldn’t it be a priority to ensure the “conversion therapy” is not ever happening the other way around?

5) In your meeting, please acknowledge that the collateral damage of youth transitions is going to be an untold number of irreversibly altered young people who are not happy. To take only a few recent examples, the detransitioners who have created the vlogs below (mastectomies at 17 and 18, social transitions years earlier) fit all of the criteria for medical transition. The APA should be honest with the public about the risk of regret and detransition. You should include this information on your website material concerning trans youth, even if these regretters are a small minority. Ask yourselves how the APA can support lesbian youth, because such females who don’t identify as trans under the age of 21 are becoming a lot rarer. The detransitioners in these videos cite lack of support for a lesbian identity and positive role models as factors in their decisions to transition.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D2KpkSSrV4o

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q3-r7ttcw6c&t=4s

No one knows the ultimate effects of early transitions on younger children and tweens. We have in fact seen that youth transitions are dangerous to some teenagers and young adults, particularly ones that are lesbian, autistic, or have mental health problems. Child/teen transitions may be wonderful for the trans community and supportive of trans rights and mental health. I am not denying that. But every false positive that happens to a minor, affecting the next 60 years of that person’s life, is a human rights abuse. A top priority of the APA should be to analyze whether or not your recommendations are increasing persistence rates for dysphoric children. Because if they are, you may be doing amazing things for trans health and trans rights but you are also participating in the most serious human rights violation of LGB people since they where given electroshock therapy in the 1950’s. This is not even treated as a passing afterthought by many in the medical and mental health field, including APA members, from my numerous observations. I find this highly unethical and I hope it changes soon.

Thank you for your time.

-Justine Kreher

 


∗ Some risks and uncertainties involved in youth transition:

·         Most children–even some who have serious gender dysphoria–desist (grow out of it) and are likely to be gay/lesbian adults, so it makes sense to be concerned about children who are socially transitioned at a young age.  Gender-affirming mental health professionals almost always tout the safety of social transitions in the public statements they make to the press and in seminars they give, even though they have no proof it is. One example is Kristina Olson, involved in the Trans Youth Project; her attitude is the norm.

·         Gender clinics report that either no or very few children desist when they are put on puberty blockers (GnRh agonists such as Lupron). These chemicals prevent the secretion of pubertal hormones, despite the fact that exposure to sex hormones may help the child become comfortable with their natal sex. This has been done with no control group of children not put on blockers. Gender-affirming mental and health care professionals all claim that these hormone blockers are fully reversible in their public statements, despite a lack of data.

·         There has been a huge increase in female teens seeking services in gender clinics. The numbers are almost 2 to 1 in some clinics. The overall numbers have gone up but why are more females relative to males coming to these clinics when the adult transgender population doesn’t reflect this? I have read many articles and watched hours of trans seminar footage from gender affirming professionals where this isn’t even discussed. The clinicians at Tavistock & Portman in Britain are the few who even bother to mention it or express any concern.

·         4thWaveNow and its followers/commenters have documented several cases where teens who desisted were initially affirmed as trans by professionals or identified as trans for over 6 months, yet grew out of it even though this would have given them an official transgender diagnosis.

·         I cite examples in this post over the seeming apathy about the safety of gender nonconforming youth who may be borderline by gender affirming professionals. This is another example.

·         Censorship around this topic is a major problem. I have encountered this apathy many times, from health care professionals, media, and even politicians. For example, Canadian politician Cheri DiNovo immediately blocked me on Twitter for trying to send her my post and for sending her links about young people who have been seriously harmed by transition in the real world. I’m shocked that any person with influence would refuse to consider information about something so important. Followers of 4thWaveNow are well aware that there is a refusal to gather all sides of this story by many people in health care, the media, and from LGBT organizations themselves. The threat of trans suicides is used to squelch anyone who asks even the most basic questions about these practices.

·         Homophobia from parents or even other societies may play a part. For example in Iran, homosexual adults are forced to transition because it is more acceptable to be transgender. A mother in a recent HBO special on trans youth admitted that, prior to identifying her young son as transgender, she would punish him for being “feminine, dramatic, and flamboyant.” A recent longitudinal study of nearly 5000 adolescents found a high correlation between “gender nonconforming” behavior at age 3 and later homosexuality.

26 thoughts on “Open letter to the American Psychological Association (APA) on the rise in trans youth diagnoses

  1. All excellent points. I might add that teen girls with Asperers syndrome particularly undiagnosed are at particular risk of the wrong treatment. This should be explored with every family with a child presenting as Trans. Sadly Gender issues are better funded and diagnosis requires less expertise.

    • Exactly. This is my concern about my transman XX “son” who was affirmed on “his” university campus, and only 6 months after living on campus “as a man” (whatever that means, and campus is certainly not a real life experience), “he” was able to get a testosterone prescription at an informed consent clinic. “He” received no diagnostic testing for any other possible underlying issues, it was affirmation & informed consent only. What did my “son” say were “his” reasons for wanting to transition: (1) living like a woman feels like a lie and (2) now “he” has friends.

      Do these sound like reasons to warrant medical transition? So now it is me, the Mom, who has set “him” up for testing with an expert in female Aspergers, which will amount to a delay of one whole year – the time my transman child has been doing HRT. I also see symptoms of bipolar, which according to an Asperger expert can be confused with Asperger’s. Yet my children are at genetic risk for bipolar disorder via their father’s family. The expert I consulted has in fact diagnosed both ASD and bipolar type 2 in some patients. Bipolar disorder is known to affect one’s sense of identity, and it should absolutely be treated prior to any decision to medically transition.

      Why is it the parent who has to work to seek appropriate due diligence for a young adult with so-called gender dysphoria? how in the world can it be so easy for an 18-year-old to get a prescription to cross-sex hormones with fast-acting permanent changes without any mental health diagnostic testing. This seems to take medicine back to days prior to the Hippocratic oath – which is a very long time ago.

      There are certainly some on the autism spectrum who still transition and live as transgender. However, not even knowing this underlying condition prior to a decision to medically transition is inexcusable, and this practice must change right away. Controls must be put back in place for patients 18-25 years of age, at a minimum.

      • My situation improved in small steps then a sudden collapse, after Aspergers traits were identified. It is a horrible situation to be in. The best hope is that increased debate and awareness of the ASD link among professionals will make assessment before medical transition mandatory. The 20 million for ASD research just awarded to Edinburgh may help. The lack of understanding of how ASD presents in girls is woeful but as more are diagnosed is being addressed. No one in my family bought into the Trans argument and those she respected the most were the most dismissive to the point of brutal. A risk but it worked. Keep communication open and don’t be surprised if they are home early from the course and you have the infamous shower moment from Dallas, as I did. One thing with Aspies, when they change direction it is sudden, unexpected and unannounced.

    • I had an amazing mentor that was (is) Autism spectrum and they were hyper focused (in a good productive way) on women’s rights as most of the lesbians from her generation. She was very gender nonconforming but never thought to ID as trans. She would have wound up in a clinic if a teen today. I’m certain. And other older lesbians (Autism or not) say the same thing.

  2. Thank you, Justine. Those of us who are in it with our kids don’t often have the time or energy to do this work. We also want to maintain relationships with our children and it’s difficult to be an anonymous activist doing something your child would see as opposition. As a parent, I appreciate the work you’re doing.

  3. Yes. It is very time consuming and most people have to be anonymous to protect their children. But I would encourage anyone here who feels their youth has not received the proper thorough psychological care and assessment this deserves to reach out to some mental health agency or political entity to let them know. They need to hear the stories that are out there. I have a contact list (all publicly available emails) that includes LGBT rights orgs, media, and mental health organizations. I’m happy to share it with anyone with the only caveat being that all communications are respectful. My email is contact at thehomoarchy.com

    • I made the mistake, although mistake might not be quite the right word, of engaging in an online discussion of female sports if Title IX is changed so that sex is replaced by gender identity. I was trying to find real solutions so that men claiming to be women or females on testosterone because they are transitioning to males could not displace actual females on teams and win victories that actual females not taking performance enhancing drugs would otherwise win. I think reasonable compromises can be found. The trans community, I found out, does not think this. They would rather all sports were eliminated from the world, rather than having a trans category in sports like running or have any restrictions that would give actual females a level playing field. My ex-daughter who now identifies as male showed up in this discussion and every statement she directed at me began or ended with a stream of insults, with the usual trans talking points in between. This shows the danger of not being anonymous, but also shows the impossible position of parents who cannot in any way engage in thoughtful discussion of any part of the trans agenda. Nowhere did I challenge her own current identity. I wrongly thought that “they”, as she now calls herself, as someone who was a very feminine high school female athlete herself, would have some care for females and their ability to have good experiences with sports and competition. It is such an impossible situation. However, now that I have been outed as the hateful, transphobic, intolerant, racist, ableist parent that I appear to be to her, I am a little more free to state my own opinion.

      • People who are different need protections in society. Everyone’s rights are valid until it gets to the point where your “rights” are conflicting with someone else’s “rights.” Then a negotiation needs to happen to assess, not people’s feelings, but what is most just.

      • Girls and women fought so long and hard to have their own sports teams, let alone for the right to play sports period! Transactivists need to understand why sports are divided based on biological sex, not gender feels. For example, since I enjoy ice-skating, I’m aware of why so few women have done the triple axel (successfully or attempted). It’s not that they wouldn’t want to try, but rather that the typical woman doesn’t have the kind of muscle mass and distribution to land it. There’s also a reason pair skating has always been M/F, and frequently pairs girls with somewhat older guys. It’s all about using their size and shape differences. I can’t see a man throwing or lifting another man, or a woman throwing and lifting another woman, without causing an accident!

      • Carrie-Anne,
        The Gay Games have featured same-sex pairs skating events. The athletes who participate aren’t Olympic-level skaters, so they don’t do the complex lifts, twists, and other moves we’re used to seeing on TV. But Johnny Weir has done throw triple jumps while skating with a male partner in ice shows.

  4. Took a look at the Atlantic article. I can’t believe (with all the evidence to the contrary) that the author believes that women are hardwired to have worse spatial reasoning or more chattiness than men. Obviously the writer wasn’t too interested in the brain science, but in perpetuating old ideas and pretending that they are new.
    Every time I ask for clarification on transgender people, I get information similar to this – easily explainable through recent brain science, but still believed because it implies that the desired narrative is true.

    • Don’t believe a word anyone says about “brain sex” being real. It’s ridiculous that we even have to argue with people about it. Whenever I have took the time to explain, I’ve pointed out that the brain is plastic. If I feel an example is needed, I bring up London taxi drivers, because they discovered that the memory part of the brain was different from other people. (I guess the streets of London are difficult, so to learn them by memory is quite a skill.) Therefore, one can’t argue that the studies (very small sample sizes & unreliable anyway) comparing female brains to M2T brains, have similarities – since obviously the brain *accommodates* to our surroundings, thought patterns, etc. (I think, therefore I am) Really, that could account for any findings of differences in brains, whether it’s sex, religion, drug use etc Recent studies showed the difference between sexes should basically be irrelevant b/c we vary more from individual to individual, than from male to female… there is no way for any scientist to look at a scan of a brain, and say for certain what sex it is.
      Now they still discussed characteristics that are found to be more common within the sexes, but again, we live in a society that constantly shapes this. I believe, studies that have examined young children’s brains, found no difference what so ever. (Before social conditioning kicks in)
      TBH, I find it offensive anyway. I don’t mind them looking for medical reasons; like for example, females tend to suffer from migraines more often. (I suffer from chronic migraines) … So that would make sense to see if there’s a structural cause. However, if they are looking for differences because they want to know strengths & weaknesses in the way we think, I’m against it. That’s why we don’t do that with race anymore – good intentions or not – it’ll always lead us down a dark path.

      Of course they won’t listen to that reasoning (“it’s feminists influencing science” – lol what? Since when?, “we all start as girls”, etc) I only bother if I have time in case other open minded people come across it.

      (Oh, MRA types and trans LOVE using the monkey study – where a boy monkey played with a truck, and a girl monkey grabbed a doll. They leave out, the female monkey played with both, and other discrepancies… )

  5. As a parent of a gender questioning teenage girl I would like to thank you so much for writing this. As the previous commentor said we find it hard to speak out – and we rely on brave and eloquent people like you to speak for us.

    • I hope the best for you and your child. You don’t need to thank me. It’s my own community I’m worried about here. I volunteered for a youth group about 12 years ago and didn’t see anywhere close to this many teens with any kind of serious dysphoria. I don’t know the extent of what is going on but it’s important for all of us to understand what IS actually going on.

  6. Just an additional comment. You mention the attitude of trans towards the non-trans gay/bisexual community. I’d like to point out that there is a lot of verbal abuse eg ‘die terf scum’ directed towards radical feminists, especially lesbians, who are trying to stand up for women’s rights in the face of the trans steamroller. Many of us share your concerns, ie that children are being pushed towards transgendering rather than being allowed to acknowledge homosexuality or bisexuality. But the trans lobby isn’t just attacking bi/homosexuals, (eg getting the Rainbow Pride flag taken down in Maine), women, whether straight, bi or lesbian, are all feeling the effect of the trans power shift.

  7. Thanks for the info — I emailed the APA today with the story of my sudden-onset teen “trans man”. She is on the spectrum, and a number of her closest friends at the high school have already transitioned. I also quoted from the detransition forum at USPATH last month. Maybe some sanity will finally hit.

    I know that 4thWaveNow has kept me sane during the last 18 months of dealing with trans fever in our home. Thank you all so much.

  8. Absolutely every one of the counselors, therapists, doctors, nurses and other “professionals” who are so incredibly sanguine about the lovely, benign non-impact of Lupron ought to be required to go on it for a minimum of six months and more preferably 2-3 years as they are advocating for their vulnerable patients. Hey, if it’s as safe as houses, why not?

    • What also bothers me so much about their constant drum beat of “Lupron is safe and reversible” is that it doesn’t address the psychological affects. Asking whether or not if hormone exposure to a youth’s brain during puberty may be what helps them grow out of dysphoria is such a blatantly obvious question to ask, even a C level college student in a 101 biology class would think to ask it. The fact that they never even mention that possibility is a huge red flag for me as to whether or not they are trustworthy.

  9. Thank you for the good work you’re doing. This is the first blog I’ve found that sanely and respectfully addresses the current transmania in our country. I have a daughter who decided about 6 months ago that because she is uncomfortable with her body that must mean that she is male. Since then it’s been an unrelenting nightmare in our house, as counselors, doctors, and even school administrators don’t even question this – it’s completely full steam ahead, let’s get you on T and surgically maim you. She’s holding us hostage to her feelings, telling us that if we don’t get completely on board with all of this she will have suicidal thoughts. I am SO GRATEFUL for this blog and in particular this article. Please know that there are so many parents out there who are struggling and we are completely alone as the voice of reason for all of this.

    • Yes, it is frightening to be attacked on all side for any kind of desire for sane conversation and responsible psychological and medical professionals. The young people are COACHED to say they are suicidal and to do the blackmail and holding hostage. The people who recommend these courses of action are despicable. Let us know if we can help.

  10. Dear Boswell, we talk a lot about “suicidality” here, because that’s one of the major ways the trans brigade tries to get us parents on board. Think about it, if you weren’t scared to pieces your child would hurt him or herself, why would you ever sign off on the crazy medical stuff they recommend? As one of the other posters said, the trans-activists have literally “weaponized” suicide against parents and others who might be skeptical.

    It’s important to learn about suicide – the facts – before you get scared into doing something you’ll regret later on. By and large, suicide is NOT a rational response to the conditions of life. When bad things happen to people, like the death of a spouse or a child, or severe illness, or financial ruin, usually their first response is not to commit suicide. If a person does so, it is a symptom of an underlying condition, often depression, that wasn’t treated, and where the bad event served as a catalyst.

    I really, really dislike the trans lobby’s using suicide as a bargaining chip. I feel like our kids are being coached to threaten this, that it’s being put into their heads as a realistic and understandable option, when it truly is not. Of course if your daughter is actually suicidal, the answer is to get emergency help for her. But do remember, people almost never commit suicide just because they don’t get what they want.

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  14. Thank you so much for this powerful , thoughtful and articulate letter on behalf of so many of us parents living this nightmare with our precious children now. I assume there was no response? The wall of silence, the flat out ignoring of centrist views shows how unbalanced and politicized this topic has become in the medical community which should always be aligned to the sciences not popular opinion!

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